If you’re reading this I assume that, like myself and my clients, you identify as a ‘high-achiever’
The title of ‘high-achiever’ for many of us is worn like a badge of honor. A way to separate us from the rest of the pack with our grit, relentless hard work and determination.
But when does identifying as a ‘high-achiever’ turn into a problem? Something that holds us back instead of pushing us forward?
I’ll tell you.
When our identity is tied to being a top performer, the go-to person, the YES woman, the rescuer, the best, the top performer…
… then we literally don’t feel safe unless we are performing and achieving.
We push and push and push. Always needing more and never feeling satisfied with what we have.
Here is the thing, identity is the strongest force in human personality.
We create our reality when we say the words “I am a high-achiever.”
It impacts how you work, treat others, and how you treat yourself.
While it’s GREAT to be proud of your accomplishments, it’s easy to conflate your accomplishments with your self-worth.
Let’s dig a little deeper.
What is the cost of this?
- You compare yourself to friends who talk about their big achievements and I wonder “Am I doing enough?”
- You give so much time to mentees, colleagues, and friends, but not enough to yourself: no alone time, workouts, boundaries, or dating.
- You are consumed by racing thoughts of achievement and your next career move, even as you close your eyes before bed, or in the spin class or on vacation.
- You just started a family, or are planning to, and cannot figure out how to make it all work
- You have a nagging fear of waking up with regret that your life wasn’t worthwhile or enough.
What to do instead?
Attach your identity to who you are, rather than what you do.
Take that in for a second.
Your value is in HOW YOU BE, not how much or what you produce.
The way you do this is by getting in touch with your TRUE self, behind all the protections and masks you wear as a high-achiever.
Getting in touch with your True Self requires:
(1) space to listen to her
(2) practices that you commit to regularly
(3) a guide
Need help with that?
You can learn more about my coaching here.